Change is inevitable, or so it has been said. There are many types of changes, and preparation for change is also inevitable. The classic metaphor of preparation of change is the nursery for one’s first child. As we prepared our son’s first room, we researched what we may expect and need. Once A.J. moved into his nursery we were prepared for the change, or as prepared as any parents could be for such a huge change.
Parenting has many changes, and some are easier than others, and sometimes there are changes that you do not expect. I recall Mindi, my wife, did not want to use a pacifier, however on the second day of A.J.’s life I was sent out to find what will become known as his “binky.” The first two years A.J. seemed to always have his binky.
We discussed different methods of getting him parted from his binky. Originally it was based around reasoning with him, such as giving all his binkies to a younger baby who needed them or perhaps a little trickery that included the “binky fairy.” However, A.J. to this day still does not communicate (part of his autism) on the level one would need for either of those plans to have a chance to work. We got him into a Headstart program starting shortly after he turned three, and while we had at least weaned him to only have the binky when he slept or napped, he would not be allowed to have one for nap time at the center. He would rarely fall asleep without the pacifier in place.
We dreaded taking the binky from him, but if we wanted him to nap at Headstart he was going to have to learn to sleep without it. Not to mention we knew he was sometimes going to “nap” just to have the binky time, but not sleep. We considered just not giving it to him, cold turkey, but how could we explain why since he does not communicate? My wife found a great idea– she was going to cut off the nub and hand him the binky and say it was broken. So that was the plan. We kept putting it off, for we liked him sleeping at night and an occasional nap. We were terrified and convinced he would not sleep well, and thus keep us up. Since we felt we knew what this change would entail, we even picked a week where it seemed less of a burden.
So we even threw out all binkies, save the one Mindi cut the bulb off, no turning back. She handed him the broken binky at bed time as she usually would, saying, “Mama broke it.” He looked at it and laughed and laughed. He held it and fell asleep almost as quickly as normal. The next night he laughed as well. By the end of the week he wasn’t even looking for the binky.
We delayed this process for fear of what we knew certainly would happen. Honestly, we can often predict our son’s behavior, and it is smart to be prepared, hence the diaper bag filled not only with pull-ups, but snacks, books, straws, crayons, coloring pages, and of course wipes for any sort of mess.
During the Transfiguration, Peter came up the mountain saw the great event and assumed making booths to contain and hold this event was the answer. This assumption came out of fear, as it says in the scripture, and I believe this not only refers to this specific moment on the mountain, but the inevitable resurrection. Jesus even tells them to hold onto this sign and God’s command to listen to Him, after He had been raised from the dead.
We know what Peter witnessed, that the tomb was empty and the change was not the change we were terrified of—death—it was resurrection. To contain the church of the good ol’ days, to believe we know the Bible, to worry about change we are terrified of actually doing, having programs without vision–this is how we try to put Jesus in a booth. We need to share the empty tomb, the great change, the laughter over death, the Resurrection!!!